I’m a stream of consciousness
woman. When I feel the emotion I blurt
something onto digital paper. I love to
share feelings, presuming many of us are feeling the same. Maybe I’m the self-proclaimed historian for
those who are either too busy or too shy to express.
Positivity ebbs and flows. Yes I use many tidal references. In that regard my emotions are fluid, like
most. Disposition can be calm and glassy
smooth like my legs after a visit by the epilator. It can be choppy when a squall moves through
my life. I can also be stormy; rain
falling in sheets.
My emotions run the gamut; learning
to control them has always been challenging.
There’s no reason to hang this on the hormones. Nope, I won’t go there. I’m human like everyone. Ups and down happen as we undulate through
life. I was emotional my whole life;
sometimes crying at the end of a movie with a solid plot and heart rending
conclusion (these were previously called ‘chick flicks’). I cried when my children were born and at
times when conventional males were trying to prove themselves above emotional
fluctuations.
I’m proud of my weaknesses. They make me who I am. I would never allow people’s perceptions to
change me; just as you shouldn’t allow it either. Being unique is an asset to me. It also distinguishes us like different color
flowers in a bouquet. Wouldn’t it be a
shame to create ultimate uniformity? How
boring would life be?
Not an advocate for radical change
(I don’t consider discovering and pursuing your true gender as radical change);
there are boundaries defined by decorum.
Stretching the limits of acceptability is one thing but riding roughshod
over decency is probably not a great idea.
So in conclusion I say “I am
feminine, I am woman, I am special and unique, I am transgender and I am making
daily contributions to the world. Life
is better because I am!” Now, say that
to yourself. Go ahead, you can whisper
it. Keep repeating until you believe
it.
Have a wonderful weekend filled
with sweet discovery.
Love and hugs, Nikki DiCaro
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