Text, Call or Lunch?

Are you wardrobing?  “What?”  Why ask, ‘are you building your wardrobe for this weekend?’ when I can condense that lovely snippet of prose into one word?  We’re busy; don’t have time to speak volumes.  Convert the noun to a verb and take action!

Abridged versions of thoughts leave holes in the understanding process.  Such holes can encourage untoward conclusions to leach into and settle onto the aforesaid abridged statement.

Interpretation is in the mind of the beholder.  That’s a quaint euphemism.  It doesn't augur well for unequivocal conveyance of meaning.  We’ve already lost considerable meaning transmittal with texting.  And you thought email was impersonal!  Yes I’m a culprit as well as a victim. Shed no crocodile tears for this girl.

“Okay no croc tears; what’s your point?  Or would you be more responsive if I typed ‘sup’?”

The point, my dear moderator, is this: don’t discount the opportunity to talk things through in real time conversations that are not relegated to the typed word.  That is, unless you can instill feelings, gestures and emotion into the written word.  Oh and typing in ALL CAPS does not qualify.  As my sweet little aunt would say, “I think you misconscrewed me.”  Incorrect pronunciation aside, she has a valid point.

Technology is fantastic, until it’s not.  No matter how sophisticated your knowledge, you can’t replace ‘personal’ with ‘impersonal’.    Nuance is martyred on the altar of the mobile device.

There are some benefits to the written word over face-to-face communication.  If there is a caustic communication you can walk away, think about the response, type it, read it, delete it, rewrite it then either send or sit on it for a while.  A cooling off period is not so common in F2F but delay in written response could leave the other party thinking there is lack of interest.

Another problem with written responses is “they are written – memorialized” and there for the recipient to have and to hold for as long as the device retains it.  If you are sending smoochies and love-laden communications the archival advantage is wonderful.  If there is less than cordiality, then you may wish to have an automatic recall option.

There’s no right answer nor is there a wrong answer.  There are situations and circumstances – each unique to your instance.  Take my suggestions for what they are.  But hazard an opportunity to make a phone call or schedule a F2F.  You can rarely go wrong with those two approaches.  The soothing sound of the voice can overcome anxiety and send a verbal hug over the distance.  Sure, words can convey but vocal intonations are more effective.  Even a pause in speech to absorb a thought can be emotionally supportive.

It’s your life and your relationship continuum.  Nurture in ways that are most effective.  Determine the line of demarcation between effective and defective.  Once established, you’ll better understand how to cultivate.

Enjoy your Thursday.

Love and hugs, Nikki DeCaro